


let nothing be lost upon you

by Aslee



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Adventuring Party Dynamics, Canon Compliant, Gen, Jealousy, Unrequited Love, mlm/wlw solidarity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22157875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aslee/pseuds/Aslee
Summary: Ragh and Tracker have a brief discussion about their love lives. Post Sophomore E09.Tracker snorts and leans against a nearby tree. She's still watching him with too-knowing eyes, which sets Ragh's teeth on edge. He begins his weird, stomping figure-eights again, so he doesn't have to look at her face while she unravels him. There's a moment where all is silent except Ragh's boots in the grass, and then Tracker says, "So you're in love with Gorgug."It's the word choice that stops Ragh dead in his tracks."I am fucking not!"Rolling her eyes, Tracker says, "The first thing you said to me was that you were gay, and I have fucking eyes, Ragh. It's either him or Fabian, and while you and Fab definitely seem buddy-buddy, it wasn't him talking about getting his kisses in that sent you off in a huff."
Relationships: Kristen Applebees/Tracker, Ragh Barkrock & Tracker, Ragh Barkrock/Gorgug Thistlespring (One-sided)
Comments: 20
Kudos: 181





	let nothing be lost upon you

**Author's Note:**

> hello i am in love with ragh and i can't figure out why brennan would have ragh and gorgug share a nightmare if they aren't in love idk idk 
> 
> title from oscar wilde as per usual but this time from dorian gray specifically. it's not even out of context this time.
> 
> might do a sequel depending on how the show goes. maybe one from gorgug or tracker's pov.

Ragh isn't known for his self-awareness, but he knows that his crush on Gorgug Thistlespring is getting ridiculous. He's a senior (and an adult, if you believe the Solisian government), so having a crush on a sophomore? Kinda cringe, bro. If it were anyone else, Ragh would be constantly teasing them. It's not even a cute sophomore, either. He would understand someone glamorous and powerful. Like an underwear model who had to transfer late because they realised their great great something or other was a dragon. No, it was Gorgug, who was the least intimidating barbarian Ragh had ever met.

He was also one of the worst kissers Ragh had ever met, which only made the fact that Ragh couldn't get their one brief kiss out of his head even more pathetic. He tried, at first to brush it off as his brain latching onto his first kiss with another dude. Of course he would lay in bed at night, replaying it over and over; It was what he had always wanted with Dayne and never gotten. But in the months between then and now, Ragh had kissed as many boys as possible. Not a single one of them had chased Gorgug from his mind.

Fathethriel had been a very misguided, last-ditch effort. Ragh hadn't even thought about it before inviting him back to his place and the whole thing had been a mistake. Gorgug had been so mopey about the fact that he couldn't talk to Zelda, and Fabian hadn't been feeling well enough to be the distraction he usually was. The adrenaline from almost losing his mom buzzed under Ragh's skin, and… Well. Ragh had never made the best decisions when emotional. It was no wonder he had gone into a rage at the end. Even after he climbed out of the pit he'd made for himself, Ragh had felt his skin crawl.

And it had all been for nothing, in the end, because he still stands there and feels his heart clench in jealousy as Zelda's message erases Gorgug's smile. He thinks, I would never do that to him, and knows he's still in so much fucking trouble.

The problem is that even though Gorgug might have been a bad kisser, the fact of the matter was that he was a pretty good barbarian and an even better friend. Sure, he might stumble over his words, and sometimes he was so confused about what to say that he never said anything at all, but that was okay. Ragh liked being quiet with him, too… Or, at least, as quiet as Ragh could stand to be.

Gorgug was the best as making Ragh feel better, through gay stuff and dad stuff. After all that with Kalvaxus, it felt right to train with him, and they'd spent most of the summer studying. Ragh had trained with Zelda, too, in her own freaky version of barbarian. Even worse, he had liked her as much. Well, not as much.

Ragh had never wanted to kiss Zelda.

She was sweet, though, and took Ragh in with the same unjudging simplicity as Gorgug had. That's what makes the jealousy so bad, he thinks. His mind won't leave it alone, even as the Bad Kids hash out a plan. He should be listening, but he's thinking about Zelda's message over and over again, feeling the rage bubble up in his chest. He can see her sitting there as she worries over what to say, the shy little frown, the way she chews at her bottom lip. They're friends, and Ragh knows her, which makes the fact that he's so fucking angry at her so horrible.

Something's wrong with him, Ragh realizes. Two of his best friends are about to fall apart, and he's hoping for it. He's a terrible friend, because all he can think about is how he would never hold anything over Gorgug's head, how he could never be that cruel. He thinks a lot more in the same vein: vindictive, manipualtive, petty, a bunch of things that Ragh knows Zelda could never be. He thinks them anyway, because something is wrong with him and he wants to kiss the frown off Gorgug's face.

It's like Dayne and Penelope all over again. Sure, it's a little different, because Penelope never was Ragh's friend, and had been a truly evil person, but so had Dayne. Ragh is the same, though. Jealous and angry and unfair.

Halfway through the planning, Ragh wanders off, shrugging off Sandralynn's inquisitive gaze. He mutters something about having to pee, and stomps off into the woods. He needs time to think, before he fucks up saving Adaine. He can at least do that without screwing everything up, Ragh hopes.

The forest isn't the calming presence Ragh hopes it will be. Everything about it is too uniform, too perfect, and the grass doesn't crunch underfoot like leaves would. He stomps around in circles for a little bit, cursing himself, Zelda, and Gorgug's big puppy dog eyes.

It only takes about five minutes for someone to come find him. It's Tracker, because of course it is-- The Bad Kids are all too worried about Adaine to think about Ragh's big gay freakout and he doesn't blame them. If he were a good friend, he'd be worried about Adaine too. Fuck, he thinks. His tusk slices open his bottom lip as he snarls at himself.

There's an urge to yell at Tracker for coming after him, to lash out like he used to. It's an urge that Ragh has to fight a lot, even after almost a year of counseling. Jawbone says it might never go away, kinda like how Jawbone will never stop thinking about the taste of blood or alcohol. Some days will be harder than others.

Today is one of the harder days, but Ragh bites it back. Tracker has had a rough time of it, what with her aunt cheating on her uncle and being transported to an extraplanar world yesterday. Besides, he heard her fighting with Kristin last night, and the last thing Ragh wants to do is make someone fighting with her girlfriend even sadder.

Gay solidarity and everything.

Ragh takes a deep breath that doesn't do much for the pit in his chest and meets Tracker's eyes.

"Well?" Tracker raises one eyebrow, every inch the badass Ragh knew she was the second they met. Like Ragh, she's too rough and tumble for this enchanted forest, all scars and distressed plaid and shaved heads. They're part of a matched set, Tracker and Ragh. On the insides, too, he figures, because he doesn't think there's two people as angry and gay as they are right now.

"Well?" he repeats, mocking, because Ragh may be a good guy now, but he's still an asshole.

Tracker snorts and leans against a nearby tree. She's still watching him with too-knowing eyes, which sets Ragh's teeth on edge. He begins his weird, stomping figure-eights again, so he doesn't have to look at her face while she unravels him. There's a moment where all is silent except Ragh's boots in the grass, and then Tracker says, "So you're in love with Gorgug."

It's the word choice that stops Ragh dead in his tracks.

"I am fucking not!"

Rolling her eyes, Tracker says, "The first thing you said to me was that you were gay, and I have fucking eyes, Ragh. It's either him or Fabian, and while you and Fab definitely seem buddy-buddy, it wasn't him talking about getting his kisses in that sent you off in a huff."

"I don't huff," Ragh says. Then, going back over her words in his mind, he stutters out, "And I am gay! I'm super gay! I would make out with Fabian and Gorgug, of course, they're both hot, but I'm not… I'm not in love with them."

"Right," Tracker says, nodding, "You're just in love with Gorgug."

"Stop saying that!" Ragh's voice goes higher than he meant it to.

Tracker's eyes narrow on him and Ragh wishes he hadn't stopped stomping. "Hold on, are you telling me you don't know that you're in love with Gorgug?"

"I--" Ragh hisses out a rough curse. "I have… a crush. On Gorgug. A stupid crush. But I'm not in love with him. You--" He points an accussing finger. "Your uncle said so!"

"Jawbone?" Tracker frowns. "What exactly did he say?"

"I don't know, like, a lot," Ragh mutters. "Like… You know, that I was… taking my feelings about Dayne and putting them on Gorgug as a way to, you know… cope. 'Cause he kissed me an' all."

Tracker's eyes widened. "Gorgug kissed you?"

The memory of the warmth that had curled through Ragh's gut at the clumsy press of Gorgug's lips captures him again. The rage in his chest dies down the smallest amount, as if only a shadow of Gorgug can still calm that flame in him. There really is something wrong with him.

"Yeah." Ragh's voice is rough with emotion, and he hopes Tracker hears it as anger instead of longing. "Uh, you know I was kinda a dick before I was friends with the party, right? Well, uh, it was because I was, like, in love with my adventuring partner. He turned out to be this evil homophobe and tried to bring back Kalvaxus and Gorgug and the rest had to kill him or whatever."

There's still a tiny bit of regret when he thinks about Dayne's death-- Ragh knows Dayne was a terrible person. Of course he does. Even outside of the evil minion thing, he had punched Ragh in the face for daring to love him. But no matter who Dayne was, he had been Ragh's best friend and truest love for three years. Part of Ragh will always believe that if he had been a little stronger, loved Dayne in a way that was a little less selfish, that Dayne could have turned out a better person. It's one of the things he's working on with Jawbone, but Ragh doesn't know if he even wants to let that guilt go.

Tracker is still watching him with kind, understanding eyes, so Ragh shakes off the depressive fog and continues. "Uh, anyway, I was… bummed out, because I had lost Dayne and Coach Daybreak-- he was, uh, a father figure or whatever --and they were both evil and it was fucking with me. But they needed me to help them take down Kalvaxus so, uh. Gorgug told me there were a lot of other men in the world who could love me and he, uh, kissed me."

Ragh shrugs. "And then we killed a fucking dragon, but you knew that part already."

"Wow," Tracker says. "I can't believe Gorgug was ever that deep."

"Yeah, uh, Gorgug is like… pretty smart? I know a lot of people think he's stupid, but whatever. He's, like, a great bloodrush player and a rock star. Besides, he always knows what to say to make me feel better. He's, like, a hella good dude."

"Wow. Man, Ragh, you have… you got it bad, huh?" Tracker is laughing a little behind her wolfish grin, and Ragh huffs.

"I'm telling you, dude-- Sorry, dudette, my bad --it's all like. Transference." That's the only word Ragh can remember from those counseling sessions last year. He's moved on to deeper stuff with Jawbone since then, because Ragh has been too embarrassed to bring it up again. "I only have a crush on Gorgug because of the kiss. I need to, like, move on. It's not real."

"Ragh…" He hates that tone of voice people get with him sometimes, like he's said something so incredibly stupid that they feel sorry for him. Pity is bad enough on his own, but there's always a tone of amusement to it, like they're laughing at him. There's very little Ragh hates more than to be laughed at. The rage starts to bubble higher again.

"I'm not a fucking dipshit, Tracker; I know what I'm talking about."

Tracker holds both hands up, palms raised and fingers splayed in a gesture of peace. "Okay, okay. Sorry. It's…" She stops and thinks about it for a second, and Ragh stills, too. They wait in the clearing like gunfighters, hands hovering over their holsters. "You guys fought Kalvaxus your junior year, right? In the spring?"

Ragh nods. "Yeah, uh, they spent most of the spring semester in juvie or whatever."

"Right. So it's been an entire year since Gorgug kissed you. Did you guys spend time together between now and then?"

"Well, yeah," Ragh says, "we're buddies." Tracker gives him an encouraging nod, and Ragh sighs, but continues. "Uh, well… that summer we did barbarian training together. He brought Zelda sometimes and we all hung out so that was, like, cool or whatever. I like Zelda," he insists, as if to prove that he's not in love with anyone. "And then, uh, we hung out after Bloodrush games and stuff but then he went on tour with Fig and we, like, texted or whatever."

Tracker looks at him as if he's missing something. "Okay, to clarify: You guys spent summer vacation hanging out, and then most of the fall semester. Then, Gorgug spent winter break and most of the spring semester on tour?"

"Yeah, dude, but I don't know what that has to do with anything."

"Ragh, when Jawbone said you didn't have feelings for Gorgug, you didn't know him. He was just a guy you thought was cute who had kissed you under pressure."

"And he didn't know his dad."

"And he--" Tracker stops. "What?"

"It's not important."

Tracker shakes her head, gathering her thoughts back up. "Anyway, you barely knew Gorgug or yourself, and you had just been through a lot of trauma. Jawbone was right, you probably were using him to cope."

"I knew it!" Ragh says, bouncing up on his toes. "Dude, I fucking told you--"

"But!" Tracker interrupts. Ragh sinks back down to the forest floor. "That was a year ago. You spent more than enough time with Gorgug to get to know him and separate him from your feelings for Dayne. You even made actual friends with his girlfriend, which would have definitely turned you off if it were a stupid crush."

"Except that I'm a shitty friend."

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Ragh, you are not." Tracker sounds angry on his behalf, which is a little confusing. How is she mad at him for him? "You thought your mom had died and you were helping Fabian mourn his motorcycle. You're one of the most patient people I know."

"Oh." Another curl of warmth goes off in Ragh's chest, the same kind he used to only feel when he executed the perfect bloodrush play. "Thanks, Tracker. But, uh, you still haven't proved I'm, like, in love with Gorgug. I crush on him because we spend so much time together, you know?"

"Yeah, except for the fact that he left for like four months and you still have feelings for him. Be honest, Ragh, when Gorgug was gone, did you think about him a lot?"

Ragh knows the answer to that without thinking about it. Fig and Gorgug's tour had meant a lot of lonely days for Ragh. Sure, he had other friends, but none of his old friends understood him, and none of his new ones were close enough to talk about anything that mattered. Going to Barbarian classes alone was shitty. He even missed Fig, even though they had never been close-- She had always been on Gorgug's other side, sending sarcastic remarks at him and eyeing Porter with suspiscion.

So, yeah, he had thought about Gorgug every damn day. Ragh went home thinking about Gorgug, too, until his mom had cupped his cheek and asked him why he looked so sad, again. After that, he's at least tried not to think about how Gorgug hadn't thought about him once with all those cute girls around him, about how he didn't even get to be jealous when Zelda had all the right in the world. Not around his mother, anyway.

Alone in bed, though, the thoughts came flooding back. Memories of the kiss chased after them, and stitched to fantasies until Ragh couldn't remember what was truth anymore. Had he reached out to stroke Gorgug's jaw? Had he taught Gorgug how to tilt his head, to kiss the way Ragh liked? Had he sucked Gorgug's tongue into his mouth? Bit at his bottom lip?

"Uh. Yeah," Ragh answers, because he has at least a little pride left. "But we're friends. That's what friends do!"

"You were in love with your last best friend, Ragh," Tracker reminds him-- Like he needs it. "And you've done it again, because, hello, you're in love with Gorgug Thistlespring."

It's the way she says it that makes Ragh angry. Like it's a simple truth. Like he's been so fucking obvious to everyone but himself. Like there's nothing he could do or say that would make his heavy pit of anger and longing and jealousy go away.

Of course Ragh loves Gorgug, but she doesn't have to say it like that.

"Fuck off, Tracker," Ragh snarls, and the rage is real now. He can feel his muscles expand, his heart rate quickening in his chest. "Just because you're fighting with Kristin doesn't mean you can pull out your Junior Counselor Psychobabble textbook. You think you're so smart, the queen of emotions, but you only want to fix our problems because you can't fucking fix your own."

He expects her to snarl back, all threatened lupine instincts, but instead Tracker reels back like he's slapped her. Something about the hunted look on her face gives Ragh guilty flashbacks to the kids he'd tormented the year before. She looks small, like the kid she really is, and vulnerable. Ragh knows she could tear his throat out, but also that she wouldn't, because they're friends, and friends don't do that. They don't scream at each other, either, and he broke that.

Ragh is getting sick of breaking things.

"Um." He's pretty sure Tracker is blinking back tears, now, and the rage is dead, dead, dead in his chest, leaving behind coal-black lumps of guilt. "Sorry. That was a fucking shitty thing to say, dude, I'm…"

"No, I'm sorry. You're right."

"No--" Ragh tries to protest but she cuts him off, shaking her head. The curls at the top, the only part she hasn't shaved off, flop in front of her eyes. Not a lot in the way of hair product on the open road.

"You're right. I'm freaked out about me and Kristin, and Adaine, and… honestly, Jawbone and Sandra Lynn. I was focusing on you and Fabian because I thought if I could fix even one thing then I could be in control again. That was… wrong of me." Tracker snorts. "I really am a Junior Counselor, huh?"

"Hey, no. You have every reason in the world to want to be in control, dude. I mean, Jawbone doesn't talk to me about his lycanthropy or whatever, but that's like… a big deal, right? Of course you need control. I'm--" Ragh huffs. "It's, like, the opposite for me. Being a barbarian is, like, the only thing I'm good at, and it makes it easy to hide from my feelings or whatever. You don't have to think about whether you're falling in love or not if you're just, like, losing your shit at people."

"Look at us," Tracker says, sniffling as she wipes the tears from her eyes. "Two gays, standing in a forest, having a breakdown."

Ragh laughs, trying to ignore the tears welling up in his own eyes. "It's, like, our natural habitat or whatever."

They both break down into giggles together, the sobs turning into the deep laughter that catches on your lungs and tugs itself out anyway. When they catch their breath, Tracker launches herself across the clearance, and Ragh catches her in a hug.

"I'm really glad I met you, Ragh Barkrock," Tracker mutters into his letterman's.

"Me too, O'Shaughnessy." They hold each other for a long minute, the sorrowful call of elven birds overhead. Admitting his feelings for Gorgug has Ragh weak with relief, like a muscle held tense for too long. With the way Tracker is a ragdoll in Ragh's arms, he can only assume the same emotion is flooding through her veins.

Eventually, Tracker giggles and peeks down at where her feet dangle a few inches off the ground. "Okay, you can put me down now, Big Guy," Tracker laughs, patting Ragh's bicep. He lets her down, smiling even though tears are blurring his vision at the edges. They sigh as one as her feet hit the grass, a ghost of a laugh weighed down with too much sorrow to take form.

As Tracker steps back, Ragh catches her wrist in one large hand and squeezes it. "Hey, everything's going to be okay, dude. Okay?"

She smiles up at him, but something shutters in her eyes. "Of course. This plan is going to work."

Ragh drops her wrist and rolls his eyes. "You know that's not what I meant."

"Yeah." Tracker winces. "If I talk about it, I'm going to freak out, though. Kristen means a lot to me, and I thought we were going to be together for a long, long time. Like, I thought forever, even. The idea of that falling through, after we've both put so much into it is crazy. It's not a stupid high school relationship for us, you know? Like, I'm sure Gorgug is super sad about Zelda but he doesn't share a life with her. If I break up with Kristen…" Tracker rubs a hand across her face. "It would take a lot down with her."

A lot of words from someone who didn't want to talk about it, Ragh thinks, but he can roll with that. "Have you talked to her about that?"

Tracker groans, eyes closing. "I tried to! I keep trying to. But it's hard to talk to her. Kristen thinks that every uncomfortable silence can be fixed with a joke. If that doesn't work she runs away and waits until the problem fixes itself. Don't get me wrong, I love that about her, usually. It's just hard to have a relationship with someone who doesn't listen when you try to communicate. Sometimes when I talk to her I feel like she's either already running away in her head, or thinking up her next joke. I want her to talk to me."

Ragh hums. He can imagine that dating Kristen would be annoying for a multitude of reasons. The fact that Tracker is only now uncovering a deal-breaker is more than enough proof for him to believe they're meant to be together. Still, he can feel the frustration coming off of her in waves. This isn't going to be an easy fix.

"You're her first relationship," Ragh reminds Tracker. "I mean, I'm not exactly an expert--"

"What with being a former closet case?" Tracker guesses, the ghost of a smile at the corner of her lips.

"Yup," Ragh said, a single finger gun of confirmation aiming Tracker's way. "Anyway, the thing is, Kristen is, like, super young, right? The Kids are sophomores, and they didn't have much time for dating last year. Kristen has it worse than the rest of them… I mean." Ragh frowns down at his boots. He doesn't like to think about the Harvestmen if he can help it; Still, if anyone can have sympathy for Kristen, it's him. Coach wasn't his real dad in the end, but he was still the only father Ragh had ever had. He couldn't even begin to imagine what it would be like if he'd lost his mother to the same fanatical rage. "She didn't exactly get to grow up like the rest of us."

"So, what?" Tracker asks, "I'm supposed to put up with it?"

"Oh, no, dude. Absolutely not." Ragh shakes his head. "I mean, you have every right to be pissed at her, I promise. Just, like, ask her to talk to Jawbone or Gilear about it or something before you break up with her."

Tracker scoffs. "Obviously. I'm not a fucking idiot."

Ragh crooks a grin her way. "You sure about that?"

She throws a punch his way, hitting him square in the shoulder, but it's followed by peals of laughter. "Fuck you, bro." Tracker tries to throw a second one, but he dodges, stumbling out of the way of her tiny, precise fist.

"Come on, don't make me kick your ass," Ragh says, breathless with laughter. "That's gonna be so awkward to explain to the rest of the party."

Tracker pauses her advance, eyes narrowing in consideration. "Fine, I'll stop." A lupine smile curls across her face. "If you tell me what's going on with you and Gorgug."

Ragh pauses, trying to figure out where the hell their conversation took a turn back into his own love life. "I've told you everything there is to know about…" Ragh winces. "That. I mean, there was that time that I offered to make out with him and Fabian, but--" Tracker burst into shrill laughter. "Stop laughing at me!"

"No, it's-- How does he not know?"

In one sentence, Tracker has hit the nail on the head. Gorgug's obliviousness was part of what made the whole unrequited love thing so painful. With Dayne, Ragh's crush was closely guarded and he would have rather died than ever let it be discovered. At least, before his sessions with Jawbone, anyway. Afterwards, though, Ragh had become more open with his emotions; Loving Gorgug was a much freer experience than loving Dayne had been. There was nothing to stop Ragh from reaching out and touching Gorgug or telling him how gorgeous he was when he smiled. Sure, he still got nervous and made it more friendly than he meant it, but it was still frustrating that Gorgug never seemed to notice that Ragh had feelings for him. Okay, they were friends, and Ragh had never exactly said anything obvious, but… The kiss had to mean something, didn't it? Maybe not for Gorgug, but the fact he'd known that it would affect Ragh, that it had inspired Ragh to fight a fucking dragon...

"It's like we were talking about, he's young. You remember what your first love was like, right? You can't think about anyone but them."

"I'm pretty sure that's the exact opposite of Gorgug's problem, but continue."

Ragh can't help but snort out a laugh. It feels a little petty, to laugh at Zelda and Gorgug's problems, but there's a relief that comes out of talking about it with someone else. "Not the point, Tracker. What I'm saying is, after prom I was trying to get over it, like Jawbone told me to. By the time I realized this wasn't going away, he was already with Zelda. He doesn't know because doesn't want to know, because it would... " Ragh heaves a sigh. "Fuck, it would ruin everything."

It's a little conceited of him, but Ragh likes to think that their friendship means at least half as much to Gorgug as it does to him. They have a lot in common. It's not like there's anyone else in Elmville who can relate to the experience of being a half-orc barbarian spending their childhood obsessed with their heritage.

"He's my best friend," Ragh admits. He presses a hand to the fresh tattoos under his shirt: the word 'friendship' written in the beautiful, angular language that Garthy had told them about. Gorgug had gotten the same one. Ragh had tried not to get too emotional about it. They hadn't gotten the tattoos for each other, but… Somehow, the fact that Gorgug cared about something as much as Ragh did meant more to him than any romantic gesture could. "Losing him would fucking suck."

Tracker goes quiet for a moment, her fists lowering and the grin falling off her face. Ragh avoids her eyes, feeling the flush climbing up his neck, and she steps closer, putting a hand on his elbow. "You don't know that he would…"

Ragh jerks away from her touch, because the sheer hope in her voice burns against his skin. "Look, Tracker, like you said: I've done this before. I know how it goes. Gorgug isn't Dayne, but that doesn't mean he loves me back. It just means he wouldn't fucking swing at me when he found out."

"He kissed you, remember?" she says, frowning. "That's not exactly the actions of a straight guy, Kalvaxus or not."

"Even if he's bi, so what? He's with Zelda." Rahg can feel the stone in his lungs start to settle again, deep and aching. It thrums with every beat of his heart, guilty and yearning. "End of story."

When Tracker speaks again, her voice is quiet. If they were home, the rustle of the leaves would have overpowered her, but the elven trees are still. "For how long?"

It takes a moment for her meaning to sink in, and he can feel himself shaking his head as it clicks. "No. No, dude, that would be…" Easy, is the word. It would be so easy to let himself take advantage of Gorgug's loneliness. It wouldn't be romantic at first, but they were friends. If Ragh took it slowly, then Gorgug would give into the familiarity of his affection. Ragh would go home victorious, with new memories of Gorgug's touch, and… And then what? Getting to see Zelda's betrayed, stricken face? Dealing with Gorgug realising the awful choice he'd made? Living with the guilt of stealing their happy ending?

"That would fucking suck," Ragh decides. "I'm not into stealing boyfriends. If they break up, it's gotta be because they want to, not because I decided to get involved. The last thing I need is to piss those two off."

"No, right. Of course you're right. Sorry." Tracker shakes her head. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"Hey, don't beat yourself up about it. You were rooting for the gays," Ragh teases. "Besides, I get it. Long adventures like this, your brain narrows into kinda 'us vs. the world'." It was one of the reasons why he'd always been zealous about protecting Dayne. Everyone went through it at least a little, but it was worse for kids without families, or at least good ones. Ragh saw the phenomenon all the time in school, and he's seeing it now. Hell, most of the Bad Kids were going through the same thing-- It was why Adaine picked adventuring over the respect she'd always wanted, and why Fig was suspicious of every non-parental adult she ever met. They all liked Zelda, of course, but she wasn't one of them. It still boggles Ragh's mind that they allow him to stick around. "It's not, like, a bad thing. You just gotta make sure it doesn't get the best of you."

"Yeah, I don't know if I'll ever get used to this adventuring thing," Tracker says, shrugging.

"I don't know," Ragh says, "You're doing alright. For a Mumple girl."

"Fuck you." Tracker pinches him, laughing, then slips her arm between Ragh's and his body. "Come on, let's get back to everyone else. They're probably getting ready to go."

Ragh takes a deep breath. It feels easier than it did a few moments ago, and maybe that's why he lets Tracker loop their arms together. They must make a funny image, with her so short and obviously gay next to him, a very large and less visibly gay half-orc. It's an image the world will have to get used to, though, Ragh decides, because he thinks he's getting pretty fond of this girl. Fangs and all.

"Hell yeah!" Ragh crows as they stomp their way back to the others. "Let's go get our sister from these fucking elves. Hoot! Growl!"

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! if you didn't, oh well. come hit me up on twitter @grandwretch either way.


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